Dear David

February 2nd, 2007

Ask David

The wisest person on the Net. He’ll answer all your questions. This was used by negotiators in the middle east to solve the conflict between the Lebanese and the Israeli’. That resolved itself, now if only Osama Bin Laden would take the Hoffs advice.

Hoff Big Brother Intruder

February 2nd, 2007

Big Brother Intruder

Hoff, the latest Intruder in the big Brother House. David was met with a raptuous applause when he entered the big brother house. Immediately the girls swarmed to David. But in true Hoff style he remained unphased and was quoted as saying “If 5 naked girls walk in on me while I’m having a shower then its not my right to do whatever I want but it is my DUTY to all men to do whatever I want.” God Bless you David, God Bless you.

Hoff in Iraq

February 2nd, 2007

Army Hoff

Hoff Serving his Country in Iraq. It is reported that David single handledly took on 15 knife weilding Iraqi soliders with his barehands. God bless you David, God bless you.

The most Graceful Dancer

February 2nd, 2007

Barishnihoff

The Amazing Barishnihoff. The Hoff started dancing at a very early age and fell in love with classical Ballet. He went on to win the junior world series of ballet at the age of 12 in Florida. He competed against 17 and 18 year olds. It was quoted in the news that “David had the strength of a man, yet the grace and elegance of a women.”

Hoff to the Rescue

February 2nd, 2007

Boat Hoff

No wonder he made it big in Baywatch, the Hoff is a boat! You can tell by Davids masculine physique that he has work hard and for many years and becoming a peak athlethe. The technique he uses here to rescue, lets say “Bob” and “Patrick”, requires incredible skill and strength. Many people pressured David to patent this swimming move but he was quoted as saying “Why would I profit millions of dollars from this swimming style when it can be used not to save one life but millions of lives. And if every person who is saved sends me a dollar then what more can I ask?”